Monday, January 27, 2014

But Amy, we moms are striving for perfection not exceptionalism

Read this article that was passed around Facebook and The Blaze?
The title "I Look Down on Young Women with Husbands and Kids and I am Not Sorry" and comments like this hit people's buttons:
"You will never have the time, energy, freedom or mobility to be exceptional if you have a husband and kids."

And I thought Amy Glass is right....
Having a husband and kids take a lot of time and energy and at some points in life, can leave women exhausted. But not drained or stripped of who we are and goals we strive toward attaining.

I'm trying to understand Amy's take on the word exceptional. 
Exceptional means uncommon, above average, deviating from the norm. 

Every woman I know is exceptional! Single, married, career driven or kid driven, all exceptional.

The big picture that Amy is missing, the point of this life:
Are we to spend our days working toward exceptionalism or toward perfection?

I speak from my view my world; my limited experience in life, well, at my age it hasn't been limited. I'm not the young mom she despises, just the older version.
I attended a university, earned a degree, landed a job, worked my way up...
It was satisfying. It was challenging. It certainly filled my days.  It was not fulfilling. There is a difference.

My career didn't make me exceptional any more than having children make me exceptional or unexceptional, as Amy might say.

But my goal isn't to be different, my goal is to work toward perfection:
A Heaven goal. And bring as many with me as possible!
Money and materialistic things come and go...

 "Lay not up to yourselves treasures on earth: where the rust, and moth consume, and where thieves break through, and steal.
 But lay up to yourselves treasures in heaven: where neither the rust nor moth doth consume, and where thieves do not break through, nor steal.
 For where thy treasure is, there is thy heart also." Matt 6:19-21

Back to Amy's post, doing laundry is not my favorite. Taking care of people I love is satisfying, fulfilling. Seeing the laundry done, for the moment, and put away is satisfying and that's something. It may before important than being exceptional. No, it's not the work or a doctor or engineer, but still work that needs to be done.

And this type of work trains us not to be selfish. But that appears to be her goal, as Amy admits here.

There is a better lesson we need to think of: benefits of the lessons of humility.
"Learn of me, because I am meek, and humble of heart: and you shall find rest to your souls." Matt 11:29
Humility works opposite pride and that exceptionalism Amy desires and urges us to do greater things above our normal strength.

No one is obligated  to get married or have kids. One can be called to live a single life, but if the goals are only for materialistic success, you'll will never be fulfilled.

I'm not going to advise Amy or anyone to get married or have children. Bravo to those who don't want kids AND avoid the lifestyles and behaviors that bring life into the world. I would hope she would keep her heart open for her Creator and her end. 

I admire successful women. I admire women who achieve their goals.  I cheer for them!
But not when they sacrifice their children or marriage to get it. So I applaud Amy for making the call not to sacrifice anyone for her goals.

There is no need for her to take time to look down on moms like me. I'm happy. I have no regrets. I still work on my goals, although they have changed as the years have passed.
I know I may not achieve them; I look for and hope for the heavenly rest in the end.

I hope Amy finds what exceptional things and people she's looking for, but I wish she wouldn't bash the ordinary folks, like her mom and sister, on her way to greatness. They may be the only ones who would cheer her on.

Keep Him with you on your exceptional journey and He will perfect it.
Good luck to you, Amy.

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